The Run Around

April 6, 2009

Remember just the other day when I was waxing philosophically about being present each day and seeing an annoyance as a gift….

Today I missed my run. Running is more to me than excercise. It is my time to reconnect to myself. It is my time to think, to pray, to solve the worlds problems and since having kids, it now doubles as my alone time. I walk out of the door into the dark morning as Cori and I walk in the door sweaty and happy as Better Cori.

Nate decided to stay up most of the night and so I decided to skip my run. And then low and behold, Nate decided to awaken for the 30 mins after I would have had to get up for my run anyway.  That was my first inner rage of the day. Scott wouldn’t eat breakfast, Nate wouldn’t eat breakfast so I loaded the diaper bag with snacks and headed out to do my budget friendly grocery shopping.  Nate had a freak out at the store so I gave him a cheese puff. That’s right people, I fed my baby a cheese puff and not just one, I let him go to town the whole time we were in the store. (in my defense, it was an organic baked cheese puff, but still….) Scott grabbed a carrot off the produce area and just started munching away and I didn’t even notice until the carrot was 1/2 way gone. Nate rubbed cheese puff residue on the Whole Foods vitamin lady when she was discussing sunscreen with me. You get the picture, not the best grocery day.

We get home, hungry and annoyed. Nate poops. Scott starts screaming at Nate that his poop stinks and that he is not allowed to poop anymore. Nate starts crying. I start screaming kindly explaining through gritted teeth that Nate doesn’t like to be screamed at and that he can’t help pooping. Scott starts screaming at me that I should have taken him to the potty and held him over the toilet so he could poop there. (he is being completely serious) I just stare. Scott goes to the playroom and dumps out every toy basket. I try to calmly explain that he now has to pick up every toy. He has a freak out.  There was more, but just typing it is making me sweat so I am stopping here… I stuck everyone in their rooms for rest time and read an amazing quote.

I have a major obsession with Kristin Armstrong (more to come on that subject later) and am reading her new book. This is the quote “A series of inauthentic choices can lead us into living a life that feels like a total sham.” Life is made up of all the little choices. I had the choice how to deal with my children and my day and I chose wrong. I wasn’t patient, I didn’t try to really understand their needs, I got frustrated and annoyed and probably made everything worse. The good news is nap time will be over (hopefully later rather than sooner!) and I will get to make a whole new set of choices. Hopefully those choices will lead me to the life I want to live.

One Response to “The Run Around”

  1. bethany Says:

    hope you get to run tomorrow… it makes everything better=)

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